Posted on Jan 23, 2019 | 3 comments

This week began just like any other week.

A week determined to ‘get through’ the week. To make it to Friday. But something happened. Revelation is beginning (again) to take hold, to awaken within my battered soul.

It began with reading a commentary on his week’s Parsha (weekly Torah reading), ‘Yitro’ (Jethro) ~ Exodus 18:1-20:23. The Intro for this parsha was written by a humble servant of the Holy One, who’ve I’ve listened to for over 10 years, Bill Bullock. His daily commentaries are written under the pen name of “Rabbi’s Son”.

As I read this commentary, I began just as I have for the past 10 years – reading it silently to myself. But then, all of the sudden, I started to read it out loud, slowly, with intent and placing my name, Pamela, into every place where it said ‘we’ or ‘our’ that I could. The dynamics of ‘hearing‘ what was being read and making it so personal was simply overwhelming. Placing my own circumstances, hurts, disappointments and life experiences into the narrative which was being read was not only revelatory, but one of those ‘light-bulb’ moments. Through the sobbing and the tears, it was clear – there is nothing new under the sun, and it was time to rise again.

One of the first things that made that flicker of light reignite was Bill’s suggestion that this is the “the parsha of Multiple Voices, Multiple Perspectives, and Multiple Pathways.” Are we not all listening to multiple voices, sorting out the multiple perspectives and pathways? I know I am, especially now since the one I have spent over 50 years with is not here to parse it out with anymore. There are oh-so-many voices swirling around my battered emotions and aching heart. So many well-intentioned souls offering help and advise, most of them I’ve sought out! But which voice will I listen to? Which perspective or path will I choose? Of course, most reading this will say, “Well, of course I will listen to only HIS voice!” … but do we? Some voices and perspectives are so clearly spoken, so persuasively presented that surely they must have received that download straight from the Holy One’s mouth! We (or should I just say I?) all need to hear comforting words of advise from those who love us. We all need that arm around us comforting us and sharing their perspective of which way we should turn. Who wouldn’t? Yes, we DO need those comforting arms and words, but whose voice do I tightly embrace and then leap forward with?

That….is the question isn’t it? Our daily lives are filled with questions…with options…with perspectives and paths to choose. And yes, just as Bill noted in his commentary, it is a test. Do we sh’ma (hear) the voice of our loving and powerful Abba or will we instead be consoled and comforted and persuaded by those well-meaning voices that surround us? Personally, it is so much easier to listen to those familiar and well meaning voices … after all, they know me, they love me and they want to see me happy and in peace. And of course they want me to do the right thing in order to find that happiness and peace! Ahhhh……but do they really know what is the right thing in my personal situation? And it’s not just the outside voices, it’s the the voice that is most familiar that leads me astray more often than not. THAT voice, usually, is the voice within! That is our most familiar voice, is it not? Bill likens it to a voice that will not “awaken us to our destiny, or inspire our awestruck hearts to love YHVH or our neighbor, or empower our newly-redeemed souls to walk with and serve the Author of our Redemption in an atmosphere-shifting way.”

The voice within usually speaks from a faulty backlash of previous bad choices, giving us options and alternatives that are feeble and survival driven. Our fallen flesh will simply try to look for a way out of the mess we have entrapped ourselves in, seek a way to make things easier or at worst, ignore all the signs from the Holy One and trample others as we search for a way out. Why do we do that? Because in and of ourselves, we usually think we can handle whatever comes our way. Maybe I’m the only one that feels this way … but maybe not. My voice is always self-limiting…always. And that voice that speaks the loudest to me usually recommends me to seek advise either from another fallen soldier or from the religious system that has been set in place over us. After all, we discern, they are probably more intelligent, more likely to have an answer. Sometimes, those voices will lead us back to the Holy One Himself, but most of the time those voices are simply using their own wisdom, understanding and interpretation. Don’t get me wrong, they can help….but they should always point us back to the Holy One for His wisdom, His understanding and His interpretation!

The Voice we need to be listening to … is one that IS Wisdom, the Voice that yes, will make our spirits SOAR, the Voice that does not put us under man-invented limitations and restrictions. His Voice…the Holy One’s Voice… will empower us, will empower ME to come out from under the yoke of man’s level of vision, understanding and intention and enable me, YOU, to embrace and walk (not just talk) in the infinite goodness of the Creator Himself!

As Bill puts it……‘we all wind up sh’ma-ing one of these voices or the other’.…so, the million dollar questions is, which my friend, will you choose? As for me, reading this Parsha from the Rabbi’s Son in first-person, out-loud, has enabled me to see that there is only ONE VOICE that I need to be attentive to……and that is His…no matter what other voices swirl around me.

Today….I am reborn (again)….and each and every day I will continue on the journey of being saved through all the trials and tribulations that come my way by seeking out His Voice. We are in this battle together, beloved. Let us all sh’ma the Voice that truly matters…HIS.


To read the entire Intro to the Parsha of Yitro (Jethro) by Bill Bullock click here and read it in first person…it makes a world of difference!  And sign up for daily enrichment ~ it’s free! Sign up for Rabbi’s Son here


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3 Comments

  1. 1-26-2019

    the first year of our walk in this ‘way’ I somehow got Rabbi’s Son and enjoyed it but most times [12years ago] he was over my head but within the past months he has come back to mind.
    I know now I would understand his teachings which are very good.Thanks for the reminder.
    And thanks to you dear Sister,,,,,yes we are all in this together.There is no way I could have known
    how difficult and hard this would be.I am reminded daily of one word and that is ..Sovereign,and He is.I am rereading Gleanings In Genesis by Arthur Pink….and see once again He is in total control.
    Blessings to you,
    sandy

  2. 1-28-2019

    Well spoken dear one.
    This is a time when you can call on Him for miracles. He is very close to you in your broken state. Things are the same but your situation is different. As you said. You’ve been born again again. You are in uncharted territory. Only He knows the way through and the pace in which to move.
    This is the parasha where Moses didn’t bother to inquire of YHVH before implementing something. And YHVH is silent through the entire passage until Yitro leaves. Reminds me of the encounter of Chava with the serpent. And like that story YHVH doesn’t miss a step. The plan goes forth as determined. So Don’t be afraid to make the wrong moves. You cannot thwart the hand of the Holy One. And He knows your frame. He will never leave you nor forsake you no matter what.
    So this is my advice: Wait, Rest Watch, and Listen.
    Take comfort from your friends and wait.
    Healing takes some time.
    You will certainly know when it is Him speaking I am certain of that.

    • 1-31-2019

      That is such wise advise Pam ~ thank you. Even though my mind wants to race ahead….inside, I know I’m not ready. Need time to heal – as you said. Thank you!

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