A week of choices…

Posted by on Jan 24, 2019 in All Posts, Pams Ponderings | 0 comments

A week of choices…

Then all the people witnessed the thunderings, the lightning flashes,  the sound of the trumpet, and the mountain smoking; and when the people saw it, they trembled and stood afar off. Then they said to Moshe, “You speak with us, and we will hear;
but let not God speak with us, lest we die.”

[Exodus 20:19-20]

Yes, this is a week of choices – according to the selected Torah reading (Parsha) for this week. In Exodus the Holy One Himself is ready to address all the people…all the people. But, unfortunately, the entire congregation of Moshe (Moses) freaks out, closes their eyes and covers their ears in fear!

Seriously??? I can not even wrap my brain around NOT listening to the Holy One of Israel – if He chose to talk to me.

WHAT DID I JUST SAY???? Did you catch that? Are you kidden me? He TRIES to speak to me every day! And yet, just like the Israelites of old, well, here I am – closing my eyes, putting my hands over my ears and singing ‘la-la-la-la-la-la’…..as I go about my daily chores and keep myself busy with stuff.

Sigh……things are going to have to change!

Each day, before I rise, I will begin to take a few quiet moments to hear the most wonderful, healing Voice in all the universe – and beyond. A Voice so soothing, so inspiring and so empowering that all my self-inflicted injuries, all the offenses (real or imagined) will be stripped away with the first note of His melodious Voice.

Will you join me?

Call to me and I will answer you,

and will tell you great and hidden things that you have not known.

Jeremiah 33:3 ESV
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A week of revelation…

Posted by on Jan 23, 2019 in All Posts, Journey thru Garden, Pams Ponderings | 3 comments

A week of revelation…

This week began just like any other week.

A week determined to ‘get through’ the week. To make it to Friday. But something happened. Revelation is beginning (again) to take hold, to awaken within my battered soul.

It began with reading a commentary on his week’s Parsha (weekly Torah reading), ‘Yitro’ (Jethro) ~ Exodus 18:1-20:23. The Intro for this parsha was written by a humble servant of the Holy One, who’ve I’ve listened to for over 10 years, Bill Bullock. His daily commentaries are written under the pen name of “Rabbi’s Son”.

As I read this commentary, I began just as I have for the past 10 years – reading it silently to myself. But then, all of the sudden, I started to read it out loud, slowly, with intent and placing my name, Pamela, into every place where it said ‘we’ or ‘our’ that I could. The dynamics of ‘hearing‘ what was being read and making it so personal was simply overwhelming. Placing my own circumstances, hurts, disappointments and life experiences into the narrative which was being read was not only revelatory, but one of those ‘light-bulb’ moments. Through the sobbing and the tears, it was clear – there is nothing new under the sun, and it was time to rise again.

One of the first things that made that flicker of light reignite was Bill’s suggestion that this is the “the parsha of Multiple Voices, Multiple Perspectives, and Multiple Pathways.” Are we not all listening to multiple voices, sorting out the multiple perspectives and pathways? I know I am, especially now since the one I have spent over 50 years with is not here to parse it out with anymore. There are oh-so-many voices swirling around my battered emotions and aching heart. So many well-intentioned souls offering help and advise, most of them I’ve sought out! But which voice will I listen to? Which perspective or path will I choose? Of course, most reading this will say, “Well, of course I will listen to only HIS voice!” … but do we? Some voices and perspectives are so clearly spoken, so persuasively presented that surely they must have received that download straight from the Holy One’s mouth! We (or should I just say I?) all need to hear comforting words of advise from those who love us. We all need that arm around us comforting us and sharing their perspective of which way we should turn. Who wouldn’t? Yes, we DO need those comforting arms and words, but whose voice do I tightly embrace and then leap forward with?

That….is the question isn’t it? Our daily lives are filled with questions…with options…with perspectives and paths to choose. And yes, just as Bill noted in his commentary, it is a test. Do we sh’ma (hear) the voice of our loving and powerful Abba or will we instead be consoled and comforted and persuaded by those well-meaning voices that surround us? Personally, it is so much easier to listen to those familiar and well meaning voices … after all, they know me, they love me and they want to see me happy and in peace. And of course they want me to do the right thing in order to find that happiness and peace! Ahhhh……but do they really know what is the right thing in my personal situation? And it’s not just the outside voices, it’s the the voice that is most familiar that leads me astray more often than not. THAT voice, usually, is the voice within! That is our most familiar voice, is it not? Bill likens it to a voice that will not “awaken us to our destiny, or inspire our awestruck hearts to love YHVH or our neighbor, or empower our newly-redeemed souls to walk with and serve the Author of our Redemption in an atmosphere-shifting way.”

The voice within usually speaks from a faulty backlash of previous bad choices, giving us options and alternatives that are feeble and survival driven. Our fallen flesh will simply try to look for a way out of the mess we have entrapped ourselves in, seek a way to make things easier or at worst, ignore all the signs from the Holy One and trample others as we search for a way out. Why do we do that? Because in and of ourselves, we usually think we can handle whatever comes our way. Maybe I’m the only one that feels this way … but maybe not. My voice is always self-limiting…always. And that voice that speaks the loudest to me usually recommends me to seek advise either from another fallen soldier or from the religious system that has been set in place over us. After all, we discern, they are probably more intelligent, more likely to have an answer. Sometimes, those voices will lead us back to the Holy One Himself, but most of the time those voices are simply using their own wisdom, understanding and interpretation. Don’t get me wrong, they can help….but they should always point us back to the Holy One for His wisdom, His understanding and His interpretation!

The Voice we need to be listening to … is one that IS Wisdom, the Voice that yes, will make our spirits SOAR, the Voice that does not put us under man-invented limitations and restrictions. His Voice…the Holy One’s Voice… will empower us, will empower ME to come out from under the yoke of man’s level of vision, understanding and intention and enable me, YOU, to embrace and walk (not just talk) in the infinite goodness of the Creator Himself!

As Bill puts it……‘we all wind up sh’ma-ing one of these voices or the other’.…so, the million dollar questions is, which my friend, will you choose? As for me, reading this Parsha from the Rabbi’s Son in first-person, out-loud, has enabled me to see that there is only ONE VOICE that I need to be attentive to……and that is His…no matter what other voices swirl around me.

Today….I am reborn (again)….and each and every day I will continue on the journey of being saved through all the trials and tribulations that come my way by seeking out His Voice. We are in this battle together, beloved. Let us all sh’ma the Voice that truly matters…HIS.

To read the entire Intro to the Parsha of Yitro (Jethro) by Bill Bullock click here and read it in first person…it makes a world of difference!  And sign up for daily enrichment ~ it’s free! Sign up for Rabbi’s Son here

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Patience is a virtue…what?

Posted by on Jan 14, 2019 in All Posts, Pams Ponderings | 0 comments

Well, that is what the good book says doesn’t it? Uhhhh….no it does not. Surprised? So was I! The bible does talk in numerous places about patience, but doesn’t actually say ‘patience is a virtue’.

So where does that handy little phrase come from? Well, the first time it is recorded was in the year 1370…yep, 1370 … and it says:

“Patience is a Virtue”
Origin : William Langland, The Vision of Piers Plowman c 1370

According to bibleornot.org website, the following is quite revealing:

The origin of the quote patience is a virtue comes from a classic work by William Langland written during the middle ages. Yet, if you are looking for the orginal text of this quote from The Vision of Piers Plowman you’re not going to find it unless you are looking for the original Middle English language “suffraunce is a soverayn vertue”.

Translation: Suffraunce is a soverayn vertue : Patience is a sovereign (supreme) virtue

Although you will not find the quote in the Bible, one can easily argue that it was inspired by the Bible. The Vision of Piers Plowman is a poem that is a theological allegory of what it means to be a true Christian. In his poem, Langland refers to the four cardinal virtues: Prudence, Justice, Fortitude, and Temperance. Patience is one of the characteristics of fortitude, i.e., the ability to endure pain or hardship.

The Biblical reference to patience (longsuffering, sufferance) as a virtue can be found in the book of Galations where it is listed among the fruits of the Spirit: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance: against such there is no law”. Galations 5:22-23 KJV.

Since the time of its first appearing, other writers have used the quote patience is a virtue in their writings. The most notable was a more popular contemporary of Langland, namely, Geoffrey Chaucer who said that “patience is a great virtue of perfection” in The Canterbury Tales. Here are a few very early places where you can find today’s Bible or Not quote.

Pacience is a greet vertu of perfeccioun. – Chaucer Tale of Melibee, c 1386
Patience is a vertue, but pinching is worse than any vice! – Lyly Mother Bombie, 1594
Patience is a virtue. – The Works of Thomas Chalkley, 1724
Aunt Prue in Yorkshire… will be able to instruct you, that patience is a virtue; and that you ought not to be in haste to take a first offer. – Richardson Grandison, 1754
Patience is and always was a virtue. – 1858 Trollope Dr. Thorne, 1858
My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. James 1:2-4 NKJV

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Joy comes in the morning…

Posted by on Jan 13, 2019 in Family Affair | 1 comment

Psalm 30

I will extol you, O Lord, for you have drawn me up
    and have not let my foes rejoice over me.
O Lord my God, I cried to you for help,
    and you have healed me.
O Lord, you have brought up my soul from Sheol;
    you restored me to life from among those who go down to the pit.[a

Sing praises to the Lord, O you his saints,
    and give thanks to his holy name.
For his anger is but for a moment,
    and his favor is for a lifetime.
Weeping may tarry for the night,
    but joy comes with the morning.

Had to remember that because of this:

What else is a gal supposed to do when there's no internet and no TV?? and yes, it's all in your perspective….Serena loves it… me … not so much.

Posted by Pam Staley on Saturday, January 12, 2019

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Thank You!

Posted by on Jan 9, 2019 in All Posts | 8 comments

Thank you!

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New Year?

Posted by on Jan 1, 2019 in All Posts | 2 comments

New Year?
What on Earth?

So it is supposed to be a New Year. Mmmmm…. Today doesn’t seem all that much different than yesterday….just another day. Yes, you do have to change the year from 18 to 19 – but that’s just a matter of getting used to it half-dozen times.

This ‘new year’ seems to be just a continuing of the year before…and the year before…and yes, the year before that. So many testings, trials and tribulations during these past years seem to just continue to hang on to you as you try to walk away from them. And so it goes.

So maybe instead of hoping for NEW things to happen during this year that is now called 2019, I’ll simply endeavor to embrace ALL things that have come and that will come in the days ahead. Just trying to stay in the middle of the path and enjoy the journey.

“Everyone has their own path. Walk yours with integrity and wish all others peace on their journey. When your paths merge, rejoice for their presence in your life. When the paths are separated, return to the wholeness of yourself, give thanks for the footprints left on your soul, and embrace the time to journey on your own.” – Unknown Author


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Life is a journey….

Posted by on Dec 2, 2018 in All Posts, Hanukkah, Hanukkah, Journey thru Garden | 3 comments

Yes, that’s what I always tell people when they ask me ‘how do I do this’ or ‘how do I do that’ when referring to first coming into an understanding of the biblical roots of their faith (or anything else).

“It’s a journey…..take time to B.R.E.A.T.H.E.”

And it’s a phrase that I I believe in. But I have realized that everything is a journey – absolutely everything. Every step we take, every breath we draw – it is all about the journey. We are here for a purpose, even when that purpose continuously eludes us.

Today is one of those days. It is one of those days when I have to take a step back, and draw in deeply as a healing balm, the words I share with others.

It’s a journey…take time to breathe.

The journey that I am on, that you are on, no matter the circumstances or situation, is one that you are qualified to fulfill. Even if you don’t think you can go one step further. But…you can. Just breathe. Deep, belly filling, lung expanding breaths. In….Out….In…..Out. Yes, you, can. Just breathe!

The journey for me is different than the journey for you – but in the end – they are all the same. That journey leads us to the person we are on our way to becoming. And it takes a life-time until we are who we are. That journey makes us who we are made to be. And we are living examples to all those around us. So just keep going forward.

As I reflect on this sometimes arduous journey, there are many insanely beautiful and serene moments; and then there are horrifying and devastating  chunks of time worth burying somewhere. But all of them….belong to me. And as my mind skips across the waves of memories, banging against the shore of reality, another unique opportunity arises. And I breathe deeply.

Tonight is the first night of the Feast of Dedication, the Feast of Hanukah. Pondering the moment of whether to light that first candle in the emptiness of my home only lasts a few seconds of indecisiveness. The answer is an overwhelming YES! And so it begins.

Yeshua/Jesus made it a point to visit the temple during this 8 day festival of rededication (John 10:22–39). Was he contemplating what was to come? Was he thinking of the cross he was to bear? Was he rededicating his life to his God? Possibly all of that and more. Can I do less? I think not.

So tonight, as I light that first candle in the emptiness of my abode and ponder on all that this journey has entailed, I, too, will rededicate my life to my God, my King, the Holy One of Israel. I will strive to keep walking forward and doing all that I know how to do to because I love Him. This rededication is always a new beginning … a turning over … a promise of things to come. The meaning of this period of time when my Messiah was conceived (feast of LIGHTS) now hits home….more than ever before.

May this time be a wondrous time for you as well. May the LIGHT of the world brighten and lighten your journey so that the path you choose is the one that brings you ever closer to his embrace.

Blessings and Shalom!

and Happy Hanukah!

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Purpose …. where did you go?

Posted by on Oct 18, 2018 in All Posts, Journey thru Garden, Pams Ponderings | 1 comment

Purpose …. where did you go?

Seems like that’s the clarion call in the wind…or maybe it’s just the wind in my own backyard. No, it truly is in the wind.  From California to New York those seven little letters are running rampant through the streets and sneaking into unlatched back doors. Doesn’t matter if you’re ten or ten times ten … it can wreak havoc on the most unsuspecting soul!

During the day one can usually quite the siren call, calm the frenzied senses, and convince one’s humble self that ‘I’m ok’… after all, you have chores to do, kids to feed, house to clean and the list goes on. But when that golden yellowish ball sinks beneath the horizon and the lights go out …. doubts inevitably begin to creep in.

Big doubts, little doubts – doubts that you can easily give an imaginary slap across the room and dismiss … but then there are those really BIG doubts, the ones that just keep shouting you down and circling your aching head. As your body cries out for just one night of restful, uninterrupted, oh so needed eight hours, your racing thoughts just won’t shut down.

The myriad of negative adjectives swirl around in your consciousness and you squeeze your eyes tight so that the fountains of the deep don’t leak out and become a torrential waterfall.  All you want is one good night’s sleep! Is that too much to hope for?

And all of those nasty little fiery darts of accusations keep coming and coming and coming……and you silently scream … ENOUGH! Eyes wide open, tears flowing and fists clenched.


You rally around your self and summon the judge of your consciousness, and you begin to ‘intelligently’ examine all those firey darts one by one.  A few can be dismissed as simply parts of old baggage that you thought you had buried deep …. really deep. Apparently, not that deep. A few seem to burn right into your flesh and you can sense the hopelessness of trying to extinguish them by yourself.  SOS…..and you drift off into a fitful night again.

Then a sliver of an answer sneaks into your feed….one thumbs up for staying on FB one week longer. Two friends, who have no idea what is plaguing you, post something that nails it! From the other side of the country they repost something that was a life-changer for them…and now for you. A reminder that you are not alone and these doubts are a part of the ‘be-coming human’ and into the image of the Holy One life-journey.

One post brought to memory of a young man name David….not the King that we choose to remember, but the young man that had been appointed as the future king of Israel by the great prophet Samuel (1 Samuel 16:1-13) but who was running for his life after being faithful to King Saul who now wanted to murder him. And along with him in his desperate attempt to allude the King was a rag-tag group of about 400 men who were also in pretty much the same mental condition. Pretty much far from the ‘man after God’s own heart’ type of role model, I’d venture to say.

Actually, as I ‘see’ David and his men in that dark and creepy cave I can definitely relate to them. Cold, sick, tired and defeated, it’s easy to imagine crying out with him and muttering nothing good under my breath. Bet none of those spear-carrying men had a good night’s sleep either.

So what is the point of this post you ask? Just go crawl into your bed and pull the covers up over your head and cry yourself to sleep? Well, can’t say that I haven’t done that, but the post went on to share that in one of the Psalms that David wrote, specifically Psalm 57, he assesses his circumstances and makes a choice. Read that again as, I have assessed my circumstances and made a choice!

As David did not deny the distress he was in or the dire darkness of his situation, he refused to stay in that pity party! As we all know too well, when we take that first step down that spiraling staircase, it is sometimes very difficult to free oneself from the murkiness of despair. But our circumstances are not who we are, they do not define us! They will, of course, help mold our lives, influence our thinking and color our world, however, again, those circumstances do not define us! We have the ability to remind our soul, our true self, who we really are – and that is, children of the Most High God! It is time to focus on who He is and not sink into the pit of despair! Once we can turn a smidgen of thought to Him, scriptures seem to bubble up from where they have been hidden confirming the truth about this King of Israel! He is a God who fulfills His purposes (Psalm 57:2), a God who saves (Psalm 57:3), a God known for faithfulness and steadfast love (Psalm 57:2, 10). A God who loves you!

By reminding our true self of the source of our connection, praising the One who will be true to His promises and who is the lifter of our heads, then our hearts turn the murmuring into a whimper and then slowly into a melody and finally all-out praises to the King and healing begins it’s surgery in our hearts!

Darkness, where blackness seems to consume one’s very soul can….and will… destroy and snuff out the true self that lies within. Doing nothing….resigning….giving up…assures that. But that isn’t the only outcome on the table!  That dark and gloomy storm in your life will also trigger within you a desire to survive. A need to grasp onto that lone life-line that swings in the distance.  That storm will push you to your limits and when all seems darkest something deep within you stirs. What is that wrestling in the depths of your being? That persistent stirring is your true self striving to rise above those deadly feelings, those defeatist reactions, those out-of-control emotions and see with clear vision the LIGHT at the end of the tunnel. That LIGHT emanates from the Source of all Life and once acknowledged, gingerly takes your outstretched hand and draws you into His bosom.

Dear beloved friends and family, storms and trials are definitely not the picnic you would like an invitation to, but sometimes we are summoned and must take our seat. Remember, however, that party will not last forever and if we believe that to be true, then – and only then – can we look around the darkened room and sense the purpose of the season and see it for what it really is! That darkened room is simply a training ground of sorts, a time-out of sorts. It’s a place where you learn to choose life or death, curse or blessing. Either sink into the mire or rise above the muck and hard as it might be, praise Him no matter what!

By allowing our true self to focus on His promises, by lifting our voices up in praise and thanksgiving, our purpose and our destiny crystallize and our hearts are renewed! When we are able to embrace that each and every time ‘something happens’ … then, then we can see PURPOSE!

So join all of us and let’s sing together ….once we were lost……now we are FOUND!

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Joy cometh in the morning

Posted by on Sep 24, 2018 in All Posts, Journey thru Garden, Sukkot | 0 comments

The Season of our Joy …. is upon us! Now…where did I put that flask of ‘joy’? Come out, come out wherever you are!!!!!! Ahhhhh…..there you are….hiding underneath the baggage of bitterness, frustration, and self-pity.

Bringing out that tiny little flask I wonder….how could such a minute little bag of joy fill this empty old tired body….seems impossible for sure.

So, gingerly pulling apart the frayed strings of that little flask – OUT POURS JOY!!!! And she reminds me, quite pointedly, how much I have to be thankful for….good health for myself, my husband’s ability to get help for his health issues, all the wonderful health and happiness my 8 grand daughters are blessed with, two beautiful and godly women as daughters-in-law, wonderful happy parents who love life, siblings that love me and all have beautiful and sweet children and grandchildren, the ability to know the scriptures and follow His footsteps…….oh my….

JOY spilleth over and covers my wounds ….. HALLELUYAH!

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Your Journey Matters

Posted by on Sep 22, 2018 in All Posts, Journey thru Garden, Sabbath Musings | 0 comments

Your Journey Matters

Everything you do in life matters….even the mundane. Maybe, the mundane is even more important!  Here is the last daily word of Rabbi Jacobson, an orthodox Rabbi that truly touched my heart this morning. Perhaps we could learn more about how to live life in a godly way from those who have kept the oracles of the great One far longer than we have known about them.


Once upon a time, the Baal Shem Tov sent a group of his students on an important mission to help a needy couple in another town.  When they returned, he was not so interested in hearing about their mission as about the minutiae of their trip—what they ate, where the slept, how they traveled, etc.

They didn’t understand the relevance of these details, but he insisted on hearing everything. When they related that one morning they sat down near a brook and drank some water there, his face lit up and he said, “That water was waiting from the beginning of time for someone to come and make a blessing over it and drink it.”

In Jewish mystical thought, space, time, and matter are understood to be forces of Divine energy—sparks which fell down to earth at the time of creation and which became embedded in all aspects of existence; these sparks must be elevated in holiness for the world to achieve perfection as per the Divine plan. This is why the little things you do in life are sometimes more important than the big things—the journey is sometimes as or more important than the final destination.

When you go to work tomorrow, take a moment to appreciate how you got there.  Every second of your trip matters—the people you meet on the way, the cup of coffee you drink while waiting for the bus, the piece of paper you throw in the trashcan—all are changed by your actions.

Quite often the things that are seemingly beyond your control are really opportunities to elevate sparks of Divine energy trapped in the mundane, and by doing so, to spiritualize the material—to bring infinite to the finite.

It’s a deeper way of looking at the world. And when you begin looking at life this way, a whole new world will be revealed to you—a Godly world, an immortal world, the real world.

“60 Day Journey” Rabbi Jacobson ~ Meaningful Life  

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