The Thoughts Within…..

Posted by on Jan 26, 2018 in All Posts, Journey thru Garden | 0 comments

The thoughts swirling around within….

What do I mean? Well, it’s been a time of reflection….within. It seems always to be a time of reflection doesn’t it? I mean, after all, we are constantly seeking, constantly desiring this or that, driving to be better or get it together or whatever. So all of us, every day, whether you know it or not are in a deep state of a time of reflection. You can be conscious of it – or not.

So many things have happened to me in the last month it is hard to grasp. Maybe writing them down will help sort out some of the feelings and emotions and help me (and maybe you) use this time of reflection in a positive and forward movement.

First..there was this dream. A dream like no other and one that is still very hard to shake. It keeps coming up over and over and over. If you’d like to hear about the dream – just click on THE BLANKETED DREAM. But the bottom line of that dream was that I was ‘covered’ in heavy, rank, debilitating blankets. The tightness in my chest, the fear, the anxiety, the depression and the helplessness was sucking the life out of me! But to keep it short, the end of the dream held the light and we are all drawn to the light!

The Light shines in the darkness and the darkness has not overcome it.

John 1:5 ~

So the dream came and went but lingered for over two weeks….wasn’t sure what to do with it except ponder it and continue to see how it would unfold. For those of you that know me – I’m not one that thinks every dream is prophetic or life-changing or something to share. No, I believe that some dreams are important – very important, but they are usually given for the one that is dreaming. And some dreams are just the result from eating bad pizza the night before or hashing it out in the never world a bad experience. It is also interesting, to me anyway, that when I dream, it’s like a movie. It’s not only in color, but I’m able to stop and rewind and rewrite most of my dreams. It’s almost as if I were standing outside the dream, watching, scripting, directing. It seems this is an anomaly, but I’m not sure why. Anyway, that dream seemed to be a turning point and my health seemed to also improve. For those of you that know me, I’ve been wrestling with a nagging persistent cough for the last 2 1/2 years. Nothing – and I mean nothing would chase it away. Not my bag of herbs, vitamins, tinctures or holistic ways; nor the medical route taken as a last resort. Nothing touched it. But the dream….the dream seemed to hold the key, I just wasn’t sure how to open that door!

Two weeks after the dream, a friend posted on FB that he had received two books in the mail and that they were blowing his mind. He went on to share a bit about the books and as I googled the author and listened to one of the youtubes….I, too, was blown away! The book was the essence of my dream! He sent me the book. I read it almost overnight and another piece of the puzzle floated into the equation. The book was basically about discovering who you were under all the ‘things’ that cover you. No, it wasn’t a religious book, nor written by a theologian of any accepted field. In fact, there are few people in my circle I would even share it with because, well, they’d probably freak out. But I have learned that you can find ‘truth’ in everything. You simply have to be willing to search for it, turn it over and over, and see it through the filter of your beliefs. Some are not able to do that yet. Anyway…..with that disclaimer, a week later another friend sent me another book that could have been the sequel of the first book! It put everything into perfect order and cemented the thoughts held within my heart. And as with most important discoveries, if we are watchful, many other confirmations will come along side of the discovery and continue pointing in the right direction. And so it has.

“In the mouth of two or three witnesses shall every word be established.” 

2 Corinthians 13:1

Simply everything you experience between birth and death is simply that ~ an experience. It is not the sum of who you are, you do not have to live in those experiences, and most importantly you do not have to RELIVE those experiences over and over and over. We, as humans, are so caught up in reliving the past (would’ve/could’ve/should’ve) or in projecting into the future that we neglect, forget, ignore how to LIVE in the present moment! Our endless, chattering, mindless ‘thoughts’ are NOT who you are! Don’t believe me? Ok – try this simple experiment. Take those thoughts – that conversation you are having with yourself right now within yourself – and pretend that it is a person sitting next to you. Now…..listen to ‘that person’ – how long would you continue to entertain such a neurosis? Not long! Why that person can’t make up their mind! They can’t stay on track for more than a few seconds! They are constantly changing their mind! They are crazy! …….. see what I mean? The REAL you… not that mindless, endless, manipulating voice in your head! No!!! The real you is deeper, no – go deeper. The real you is what you have been searching for – the one that was created in the image of the Creator. And it is not the voice in your head!

God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.

Genesis 1:27

Start pondering and meditating and turning that over……..YOU have been created in HIS image! Now dismiss that voice within that tells you otherwise!



The Blanketed Dream

Posted by on Jan 26, 2018 in All Posts, Journey thru Garden | 2 comments

At bible study last week, we entered into one of our many rabbit trails. Thank goodness for rabbit trails!

As we shared around the table and concerns came and went within the group – someone said that my ‘coughing’ (a 2 1/2 yr problem) might be a symptom related to ‘grief’ and reminded me that she had told me such a year ago. Really, I thought to myself. I didn’t remember that, but it did stick with me as my mind delved into the memory banks of my psyche as I tried to pull things forth to remember what she had said. Nothing came up.

That night it was still on my mind and as I laid down to go to sleep – I asked the Father to give me insight into whether this coughing and other health symptoms for the last 2+ years could possibly be related to something called grief. Goodness knows, I had experienced a lot of stress and problems in the last few years – but for it to cause such ongoing health issues?! Surely there would have to be more to it than a bit of stress. Would it not make more sense for the experiences of life to simply influence feelings of desperation, depletion and a worn out feeling rather than health issues? But after several years of suffering, it didn’t take long to convince myself to look a bit deeper and think outside my proverbial box. And this subject … grief… had come up one too many times – it was weighing too heavily on my heart. Little did I know what would transpire later that night.

As I tossed and turned, wrestling with unraveling the chaotic and unruly dimensions of the dreams, the night dwindled and rays of light began to sneak into the northern windows of my room. The chaos seemed to quiet and the pieces seemed to begin to slowly connect. As the dream state gained clarity it was as if I was standing outside myself, amazed at the developing scene! Let me try to explain, because really, I’m not crazy.

It doesn’t really seem necessary to go into all the sordid details of the whys and wherefores of how I arrived at this present situation.  Suffice it to say that it slowly edged its way in – it just did – and it could have been from any number of situations and circumstances. What is the most important thing to realize now is that it did happen, and we are here in the present, recognizing that something is terribly off kilter. Those moments of yesterday have so infiltrated the joy and confidence of living fully in my life that it is time to STOP, DROP and PRAY. It is time to seek help from the only One that has help to give. And it was time to LISTEN.

So let me try to explain this experience received in a dream, from the present, reaching back to the past.

Wrapping my brain around the ‘where’ I was in this dream state, it seemed to be that there was a heavy, steel meshed army blanket wrapped tightly around me. I struggled to free myself from it but it was so heavy … so very heavy and cumbersome and it seemed to take everything in me to lift a corner of it to begin to free myself of its weight. Crawling out from beneath it, examining it as it lay there – a name began to glow across the dirty death gray colors and HUMILIATION came into full view. It was like a neon sign – blinking red and white, red and white. Shocked and dismayed, I struggled to back away from the intensity of the meaning and managed to crawl away and kick it into the corner of the room. But even though it was now lifeless and lied in the proverbial corner, looking so old and heavy and dirty – I realized that I was not free! Other dark, dank and wet blankets were still heavy on my shoulders! That first blanket of HUMILIATION lay there useless and still, but there was more to be done.

The next blanket seemed to be coming alive … it seemed to be woven with maggots and creepy crawly things reeking of a subtle bloody red stain from the wounds it had inflicted… again, old and decaying. Its name was filled with a combination of BITTERNESS and FRUSTRATION and had overshadowed a lot of my life due to what was perceived as the injustices of the world and mankind against me, especially injustices of those closest to my heart. Real or perceived – it didn’t matter – as they all were intermingled into one ugly glob. That wreaking, deadly blanket, had brought forth the HUMILIATION rag which prevented a successful and joyful sense of living. As I ripped that deathly wrap from body in my dreams and cast it aside with the nasty blanket of HUMILIATION I exclaimed triumphantly that I was FREE!!! But to my utter dismay, again – I was not! There was more, but seriously, how much more could one body endure? How had we gotten to this level of despair?

Sinking deeper, falling to my knees and weeping uncontrollably within my dream, the cause of all my emotional, physical and spiritual quandaries became crystal clear … beneath the rags (as they could not qualify for anything else) of Humiliation and Frustration/Bitterness …yes… arose the security blanket of GRIEF. GRIEF was the blanket that I had carried throughout all my years! I recognized it immediately! It was that long forgotten little blanket given to me as a child to ease my fears, to hide my face in when tears escaped. It had originally been a beautiful fuzzy little pink blanket with lovingly sewn silk edges that comforted me in my pain and hurts. It was my ‘baby blanket’ that nurtured and protected my heart when it was broke. It became the symbol, the icon of a trusted friend who protected the heart of a child who experienced rejection in some way, shape or form.

So there we have it…a soul who had originally been thought of in HIS IMAGE, wrapped in HIS BREATH and had rested in HIS LOVE and HIS LOVING CARE had crossed into another realm of time and now had tasted the experiences of living in a confined time.  A soul that had been protected and nurtured by the Creator of Life outside of time had collided with life in another time and had been met with rejection on various levels.   Instinctively recoiling and covering up the pain with a security measure of protection, blanketing the hurt.

Where does that rejection first come from? How could it grow without one noticing? How did it come to be so many? Could it be possible that it is initially from within your mother’s womb? Could her life experiences, her hurts, her fears, her rejections become internalized and pass through the veils – becoming a part of who you are? Were you able to feel those vibrations within your protected place? Maybe. Worth more than a few thoughts anyway. Then later comes that child’s own grasp of rejection outside the cocoon of safety – in the form of a cry not answered, of an experience not pleasant, of bullying, of failure and on and on. And as rejection grows and insecurity builds we begin to wrap our lives in concealment with various coverings, until we are so far from our ‘beginning’ we do not know who we are anymore!

So after realizing that the heavy rag of HUMILIATION was the ultimate layer, followed by the wounds of BITTERNESS/FRUSTRATION, all produced and fed from a protective layer of GRIEF we have reached the true cause … FEAR OF REJECTION. The child’s heart that lies beneath all the weight of the rags accumulated throughout the years of survival, the chaos that covers up the innocence and purity of the heart of that child of God, still beats. That tender heart which the Father touched with His breath, His life, His will still desires to be nurtured, to be cared for, to believe in the realm of the good and the pure; even when the experiences of life have calloused and broken it beyond recognition.

So finally, here is where we are…. Back at the beginning. We are taking time to ‘see’ the child within who is innocent and believing and trusting and hopeful. We are stopping and facing full in the face all our fears, all our distrusts, all our issues and coming, slowly, to the realization that we are still, down deep beneath the facades, the same essence that HE first created! YES! We are still as we were in the beginning, because ALL of the circumstances and situations that we have encountered during this journey are simply one thing – EXPERIENCES along the way! Think on that, chew on that, ponder and meditate on that – they … are … simply …. EXPERIENCES – along the way of life. Experiences that are meant to be used to learn how to LIVE. No more…no less. Experiences that come about because of choices, or come about just because. Experiences that result from our own issues, or the result of our reacting instead of responding. There is a depth of understanding in that last phrase if one takes the time to delve into the ocean of meaning it contains. Experiences are neither ‘good nor bad’ … they simply exist. Assigning a good or bad quality to an experience only comes from our own perspective. To one they may be a ‘good’ thing – to another not so much. It is all based on our perspective of how it should be. Please turn that over a few times in your heart. It will change your outlook and the way your life. And when we learn to step back and learn how to ‘respond’ rather than immediately ‘react’ – our experiences will teach us, not drain us.

As the dream state began to wind down and wakefulness began to emerge, I wondered – ok – now whatwhat do I do with all this? How can I use this experience to learn how to live – to be healed in every aspect of this life? And immediately the answer of clarity exploded around me and the true reality of who I was and who I am is now in full agreement with the child within and the old woman without. The veil has been torn and reality has been exposed … the LEGION of angels that surrounded and protected my existence in the beginning are now fully visible in all their glory and brilliance – so vibrant they take one’s breath away! Why did I not see them before? It is so obvious now! In my hand is clutched the Sword of Truth (symbolized by the Sword of Solomon that my son Jason presented to me on my 65th birthday) and before and behind and above and below is the pure white light of the Messiah who walks before me! THIS LIGHT, THIS KNOWLEDGE has fully disintegrated the scraps and worn threads of those filthy blankets that blocked out the brilliance of Messiah fullness. It has reduced the perceived or real issues to simply what they truly are – experiences. And experiences are simply meant to be used as guideposts along the journey of life. No longer will I reach for the wretched rags of heaviness to comfort and ease perceived painful experiences. No longer will I allow the stench of humiliation, fueled by bitterness and frustration fed by the mantle of grief due to perceived rejection causing my heart to fear and fail. NO…. not today, not today.

Today… I am bathed in the LIGHT and can SEE. This journey… just beginning!


Something to think on ….

Posted by on Jan 15, 2018 in All Posts, Journey thru Garden | 0 comments

Something to think on ….

A friend of mine always posts such wonderful, uplifting, warming messages – he truly ‘gets my day going’ …

Majesty. Magnificence. Beauty.

Peace. Joy. Hope. Love. Kindness. Gentleness. Meekness [i.e. quiet, reserved, peaceful inner strength].

Draw these things.

Write about them.

Teach about them.

Sing them. Choreograph and dance them.

Design them into clothing, into room decor, into flower arrangements, and into buildings.

And most of all, BECOME THEM.


Tip: Sign up and follow Bill Bullock!


Weeks End Weigh In

Posted by on Jan 12, 2018 in All Posts, Journey thru Garden | 0 comments

Well, at the end of this day, we will rest from our weigh in. After all, sometimes you just have to pick yourself up, dust yourself off and carry on! What better time to do that then the beginning of His rest ~ Shabbat!

Shabbat holds such a special meaning to those who ‘keep’ her. She was set aside by the Holy One of Israel, the Creator of All, the One who Is and Was and Is to Come! Shabbat is the sign of the Covenant!

Here what God said in Exodus 31:13 ~

“But as for you, speak to the children of Israel, saying, ‘You shall surely observe My sabbaths; for this is a sign between Me and you throughout your generations, that you may know that I am the LORD who sanctifies you.’

My question would be are our generations finished? Has ‘forever’ been done away with? That’s the question that originally brought me to the point I am at today …. I found that forever had not been done away with!

So with that being said, Sabbath is drawing near and while we have looked at various things concerning weighing in, measuring up and finding out who we are in Him, we can now rest in Him and know that He knows all, He is in charge of all and He desires for all of us to return to Him. Whew! It is such a blessing and a relief to rest in the One who cares for us like no other.

The Sabbath, from the beginning of time, is a sign. Webster’s Dictionary defines a sign as a badge, a symbol, mark or token of identity. It goes on to say that it is something indicating the presence or existence of something else or to identify or advertise a place of business or a product. In fact, when Moses actually wrote down the word, it was ‘owth in Hebrew – and meant exactly that – “a sign, signal, distinguishing mark, banner, remembrance, warning; a token, ensign, standard, miracle, proof” (taken from Brown, Driver & Briggs Hebrew Lexicon).

So what does that mean to us, today? Does the Sabbath as the Holy One set it in place hold a special place in your heart? God has given us the Sabbath and commands His people to keep his Sabbaths as a sign. A sign of what, you ask? A sign of identity!

Keeping the Sabbath identifies you that you are His! By keeping the Sabbath, we are sanctified – He is ours, and we are His!

So let us rest from our work, our preoccupations, our cares and worries, and enter into HIS rest! After all, forever hasn’t come yet, and He is inviting us to sit with Him at His table. Will you join us?

Shabbat Shalom!



New Week, New Weigh-in Thoughts

Posted by on Jan 9, 2018 in All Posts, Journey thru Garden | 2 comments

Well, I’ve mulled it over all weekend and again, here we are – a new week – what on earth happened to last week? Gone…just vanished into the great dense nothingness.  And once again, I feel like nothing was accomplished. Ok….so pick yourself up and let’s begin again.

Time to weigh in for the upcoming week. Forget the physical – if that comes that will be a joy in and of itself…but this is a spiritual weigh-in.  An evaluation of sorts … and it still feels like I’m on the bottom rung of acceptance. But maybe I’m too hard on myself – I find most women beat themselves up needlessly when everyone around them thinks they are just simply the best. Yep…I’m one of them for sure. Spend way too much time in the would’ve, could’ve, should’ve lanes. How do you rate on that? Well, it IS weigh-in time. Go ahead, I’ll wait.

Ok – so now that you’ve beat yourself up on all the things you could’ve, should’ve, would’ve done if you had known better about something, think on this. Is this where you want to live? Me either. Nada. So, let’s climb out of that slimy pit together and learn how to completely rest in Him. It’s really not as difficult as we make it out to be, it’s simply a matter of just doing it. Consider this offer from the Holy One Himself.

“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.”  (Proverbs 3:5-6)

Simple as that. Read each word and just do it. Don’t over-theorize it, don’t break it all down, don’t examine each letter and turn it over into Hebrew or Greek or whatever…..just take it for what it is and do it! Are you with me?  Let me know how you have acknowledged Him this day – no matter what you are ‘looking’ at.


The Weigh In Continues

Posted by on Jan 2, 2018 in All Posts, Journey thru Garden | 4 comments

The Weigh In Continues

Let’s continue with the thought for the day…..

As we walked our way through various memories and ideas yesterday, we were left with the thought that it’s not all about the weigh in on the notorious dreaded scale hidden in the bathroom. Way more.

It’s true, we could all probably stand to lose a few extra pounds, especially if you indulge in the excess that seems to abound in the end of the year holidays …. whether you remember the historical drama of the few against the many memorialized in the eight-day festival of Hanukkah, or a day chosen by Roman officials and set apart a couple centuries after our Savior was born or the end of the year debauchery or even just the endless office parties and house hopping extravaganzas. Excesses abound in yummy fried foods and endless tempting exotic drinks. Time to take stock in everything that we do … time to go forward. So besides those pounds of flesh, what about the pounds of spiritual baggage that we carry forward? Let’s examine some of it and be honest with ourselves for once in our lives. After all, our lives depend on it!

Yesterday we talked about the faces we wear compared to the authenticity of who we are. What does that actually mean? Well, weigh in and take stock of how many faces you wear. Seriously….do you ‘look one way’ with one of your best friends compared to someone you rarely know? Do you put on a happy face when you’re emotionally dismantled on the inside? Do you act silly and laugh loudly when you really want to throw something? I know I do – so let’s get real. Actually, all our faces come down to probably one thing – survival. We live in a world where we were thrust into a family, town and schools not of our choosing. Everything introduced to us from the beginning of conception till this day in history has been a product of the family we were born into, the environment surrounding us and the situations we were thrust into not of our making. Think about that for a few moments. YOU are a product not of your choosing….until now! 

Today…you can choose. 

Now, that doesn’t mean you can go back in time and choose to look around and pick that well-to-do, perfectly manicured family that you know deserves you and will give you absolutely every opportunity. No. You’re pretty much stuck with what you’ve gone through to date. And it doesn’t mean you can look back and discount everything and start over. Nope, stuck there too. Nor does it help to place blame on anyone and everyone or raise your fist to Almighty God and blame Him and then just go and do whatever you want to do. Nope. Nope. Nope. But it does mean you can evaluate everything that brought you to this point and do something about it right now!

So that brings us to the WHAT of what we can do. What can you do? Please stop right here and think about whatever comes to your mind about your past – your family’s past – your environment – anything that comes across those frontal lobes … let it linger and then let it slide on out. Ok….let’s go on.

Now that we’ve got a few things that really impacted us … let’s go see what scripture says in the beginning. In fact, let me borrow a few words from my friend Skip Moen:

Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness;  Genesis 1:26a NASB

Image/likeness – According to a footnote in the Siddur, a synonym for nefesh hayah in the Mishnah (Bava Kanna 2a) is mav’eh which the Talmud derives from the root ba’ah (to ask, request, seek).  Furthermore, Onkelos renders nefesh hayah as “speaking spirit” (ruah mamlal’).  The implication is significant. Our identity is tied directly to our conversation with each other and our Maker.

Wow….did you get that???

Our IDENTITY is intimately intertwined with CONVERSATION!!!

Are you smiling yet?

Well, check back tomorrow and we’ll see how this plays out. Till then, think on where we’re going with this and come up with your own ideas on the ‘what’.

See you tomorrow – that is, if you’re signed up for this newsletter (sign up on the side bar). ~ Pam



Time to weigh in….

Posted by on Jan 1, 2018 in All Posts, Journey thru Garden | 2 comments

Time to weigh in….

Loaded title eh?

Think of all the ‘weigh-ins’ that go on during this time of year. Many celebrate the Gregorian calendar with ‘weighing in’ heavy on the mind, heart and soul! And there is a spider web of definitions if you don’t stop at the scale!

During this time of the year, commercials are extremely in your face about how fat you are … how much weight you need to drop, the greatest and bestest no-failure diet plan, pill or program. How could one not look in the mirror and ‘see’ rolls hanging over the belt line, a little sagging of the neck and resolutely sigh heavily as those extra pounds stare back at you? Stepping on that silent punisher of ‘this is how it really is girlfriend’ always points an accusing finger and frowning face, even if you do strip down to the bare necessities behind closed doors!

So weighing in can be simply stepping on a scale to see how much you need to ‘lose’ or it can be much, much more! Let’s look at it a little more broadly (pun intended). Truth be told, we could probably all stand to lose a few pounds in the flesh department. I know I could. There, I have said it outloud – that skinny little gal of 18 who had to sneak behind her mother’s back and eat those nasty flavored cream weight-on wafers so she could gain enough to fit into her size 6 wedding dress … well, can’t even get it up over her hips anymore! Yep….don’t think I’ll ever weigh 99lbs again! But….it’s ok – I’m not 18 either.

But since the here and now is actually ‘in the flesh’ – those extra pounds can actually serve to help us dig a little deeper. Are there emotional issues or other circumstances that cause us to put on a bit more than we actually need? Do we deal with the stress in our lives better now than when we were young and innocent? Do we hold on to grudges and nurse offenses? Do we get upset when our FB post isn’t liked or shared or even acknowledged? Or worse yet do we go off on our own little tyrant of self-righteousness and belittle a poster off our wall when they differ in understanding? Hmmmm….just some things to flesh out.

Extra weight brings a variety of health problems, physically and emotionally. Some of us are content with packing it on because it offers sort of an insulation blanket and some of us walk around worrying about it all day long yet don’t really get off the couch to do anything about it. Most of us mingle the two reasons. Speaking from personal experience here, so don’t go all nuts on me and get offended. But again, this post really isn’t about what we ‘see’ on the outside – it’s about getting past the visual and going a bit deeper to understand the root of our problems. So let me explain a little bit about my year 2017. It was a very difficult year and while I don’t particularly celebrate this time of the year anymore as a “New Year” choosing instead to honor the new year on my King’s calendar, I do recognize the passing of the Gregorian calendar and my connection to it for all those past years. And truth be told…you can’t really get away from the whole world’s obsession with getting rid of the old and ringing in the new. So be it.

This year was a time of ‘passing’ … in so many ways. Sitting here and trying to articulate the perfect word for losing loved ones … is so inadequate and pointless. There are no words. Not only did one of my best friends, Robin, leave this world behind but so did another friend of 30 years. Two of our life-long pets both left us within a month of each other ~ Moriah and Benson. Each and everyone added something very positive and special to our lives and will be greatly missed. But the most difficult and hear-wrenching blow we dealt with this year was the unexpected and sudden passing of our youngest son, Jason. We are still reeling and recovering from his sudden departure. Not seeing his face, not hearing his voice, not feeling his bear hugs at times unbearable. The hole in this mother’s heart is beyond words, beyond articulating anything intelligible. It just is ~ even though, yes, I hear you – I will see him again. That is ‘my’ saving grace and until then, I will still miss him being here in the ‘flesh’. Someone whispered to me this thought and I hold onto it tightly, “Their time is simply not our time and in time, all time will be one again.” Yes, our loss was great this year … and we are still in recovery … probably always will be. Separation and estrangement are part of the cycle of life, and no, life is not fair.

Maybe you also have gone through difficult times and seasons in your life. Doughnuts to dollars bet you have if you’ve lived life at all. But maybe this year we can all learn to help each other through those struggles with a bit more understanding, a bit more tolerance and a whole lot more love. Instead of reaching for another piece of chocolate or an extra glass of wine to help soothe the heartache, maybe we will be able to reach up for the outstretched hand – a hand that judges not. Maybe we can ‘see’ with the heart of God instead of from our own spin and perspective. If that becomes possible, we will stop trying to add another covering over our wounded soul…a fig leaf, if you will. We will stop hiding under a façade of expressions that we have become experts at pulling out for our protection at a moments notice. Maybe then, when an aroma, a sign, a memory floats to the surface and all the faces we have perfected for preservation sake, crumble around us and we are left naked and afraid we will reach out and look up. We will do so because we know we have those around us that truly do care, do comfort, do hold us up, with no agenda on their own. Then….then….dear friend, we truly will have a new year.

Stick with us here, we’re going to explore this more in the days and weeks ahead, so sign up for our newsletter (located at the right hand side of the post) and let’s put down the mask and pick up authenticity! 


The Feast of Tabernacles ~ Sukkot

Posted by on Dec 27, 2017 in All Posts, Sukkot | 0 comments

This was an article posted by a good friend, Pam Miller, on her blog – it was so thorough and extremely well written that I wanted to share it with all of you. Enjoy!


The Feast of Tabernacles- Sukkot

~An ingathering of rising up tents or booths; praising Yahweh for delivering us out of the land of Egypt; knowing HIS work had completed everything. They were to tell their children for all generations to always remember that Yahweh is their /our Elohim. ~

The Feast of Tabernacles, also known as Sukkot, is a celebration resting in Yahweh; remembering and praising HIM for delivering the Jews, and the mixed-multitude out of the Egyptians hands (slavery). This is also one of the three appointed times known as “Pilgrimages.”

The three pilgrimages are: Passover (Pesach), Pentecost (Shavuot), and Feast of Tabernacles (Sukkot). These appointed times, along with Unleavened Bread (Chag HaMatzah), First Fruits of Barley (Ha Bikkutium), Trumpets (Yom Teruah), and Day of Atonement (Yom Hakippurim/Kippur) are the appointed times of Yahweh, also known as the Moedim.

The Feast of Tabernacles (Sukkot) is the last fall feast, and the 7th Feast. It is very important to capture the connections. Sukkot is to rest, and the Sabbath is also on the last day of the week–7th day to rest in HIM as He has completed the week. Also on the day of creation, Adam and Eve were to rest on the 7th day. As you remember, they were created last on day 6. Many ask why they had to rest when they didn’t even work the garden for a week yet. It wasn’t anything they did or didn’t do to earn that rest. The Sabbath (day of rest) was blessed, sanctified, and made Holy. It is a remembrance that everything is completed in HIM. There isn’t anything we can do to improve what Yah has already done.

There are some very important connections to know:

• Yahweh’s 7th Spirit is Spirit of Fear (Reverence)/ Ruach Yirat Adonai.
• Characters: Humble, Quiet, Peaceful, Obedient, Respectful, Fearless of wickedness, and love.
• The 7th Hebrew letter is Zayin- Weapon cut off.
• Laodicea Church
• Justice of the People
• Kodesh (Holy)- Set Apart
• Perfection of the Spirit (Alowine, Creation Gospel)

Sukkot is a 7-day celebration, and the 8th day is a High Sabbath, and so is the 1st day of Sukkot. The number eight also resembles “New Beginnings.”

Leviticus 23:33-44
33 ADONAI said to Moshe,
34 “Tell the people of Isra’el, ‘On the fifteenth day of this seventh month is the feast of Sukkot for seven days to ADONAI.
35 On the first day there is to be a holy convocation; do not do any kind of ordinary work.
36 For seven days you are to bring an offering made by fire to ADONAI; on the eighth day you are to have a holy convocation and bring an offering made by fire to ADONAI ; it is a day of public assembly; do not do any kind of ordinary work
37 “‘These are the designated times of ADONAI that you are to proclaim as holy convocations and bring an offering made by fire to ADONAI -a burnt offering, a grain offering, a sacrifice and drink offerings, each on its own day –
38 besides the Shabbats of ADONAI, your gifts, all your vows and all your voluntary offerings that you give to ADONAI
39 “‘But on the fifteenth day of the seventh month, when you have gathered the produce of the land, you are to observe the festival of ADONAI seven days; the first day is to be a complete rest and the eighth day is to be a complete rest.
40 On the first day you are to take choice fruit, palm fronds, thick branches and river-willows, and celebrate in the presence of ADONAI your God for seven days.
41 You are to observe it as a feast to ADONAI seven days in the year; it is a permanent regulation, generation after generation; keep it in the seventh month.
42 You are to live in sukkot for seven days; every citizen of Isra’el is to live in a sukkah,
43 so that generation after generation of you will know that I made the people of Isra’el live in sukkot when I brought them out of the land of Egypt; I am ADONAI your God.’”
44 Thus Moshe announced to the people of Isra’el the designated times of ADONAI.

Deuteronomy 31: 10-13
10 Moshe gave them these orders: “At the end of every seven years, during the festival of Sukkot in the year of sh’mittah,
11 when all Isra’el have come to appear in the presence of ADONAI at the place he will choose, you are to read this Torah before all Isra’el, so that they can hear it.
12 Assemble the people-the men, the women, the little ones and the foreigners you have in your towns -so that they can hear, learn, fear ADONAI your God and take care to obey all the words of this Torah;
13 and so that their children, who have not known, can hear and learn to fear ADONAI your God, for as long as you live in the land you are crossing the Yarden to possess.”

Those with a willing and contrite heart were to bring their offering for the Tabernacle of Yahweh (God). It is a joyful act to the giver, as well as to the receiver—happiness. It is also a loving way to rejoice in all of HIS provisions he has given.

Exodus 40: 34-38
34 Then the cloud covered the tent of meeting, and the glory of ADONAI filled the tabernacle.
35 Moshe was unable to enter the tent of meeting, because the cloud remained on it, and the glory of ADONAI filled the tabernacle.
36 Whenever the cloud was taken up from over the tabernacle, the people of Isra’el continued with all their travels.
37 But if the cloud was not taken up, then they did not travel onward until the day when it was taken up.
38 For the cloud of ADONAI was above the tabernacle during the day, and fire was in [the cloud] at night, so that all the house of Isra’el could see it throughout all their travels.

In the days of Yeshua, there were two and a half million people who participate in the Feast of Tabernacles.


The singular word for booth is “Sukkah.” The sukkah was built with three enclosed sides, and one side left opened, with a curtain. The roof was to be made by things growing from the ground. Boughs of palm or willow tree were traditionally used. The roof must not be completely covered because the inhabitants of the sukkah must be able to see the stars. Rain must also be able to get in, but the roof must provide more shade than sun. (Moed Ministries).

It was commanded to rejoice! Imagine that? Our Yahweh (God) wants us to have a party and have no complaints. HA HA!

They all sang the Hallel Psalms 113-118, Isaiah 12:3, and from the song of Moses.

Isaiah 12:3 (CJB)
Then you will joyfully draw water
from the springs of salvation.

WHO is the living water? Yeshua, and “Yeshua” means Salvation!

Psalm 118:14-15 (CJB)
14 Yah is my strength and my song,
and he has become my salvation.
15 The sound of rejoicing and victory
is heard in the tents of the righteous:
“ADONAI’s right hand struck powerfully!

Exodus 15:1-2 (CJB)
15 Then Moshe and the people of Isra’el sang this song to ADONAI:
“I will sing to ADONAI, for he is highly exalted:
the horse and its rider he threw in the sea.
2 Yah is my strength and my song,
and he has become my salvation.
This is my God: I will glorify him;
my father’s God: I will exalt him.

“At the Feast of Tabernacles, the priests were divided up into three groups. With two and a half million people, they needed every priest available. One group of priests took care of all the offerings and sacrifices. The second group, headed by the high priest, was in charge of the drawing of the water for the water pouring ceremony. The third group went to the willows to cut the willows from the brook to satisfy the requirement to rejoice with the willows of the brook. The group headed by the high priest went out the Water Gate, the southern gate, down to the pool of Siloam. The priest used a golden vase to draw the water from the pool. The water was known as living water. The high priest’s assistant had a silver vase filled with wine. At the head of the large procession, the high priest carried the living water back to the temple.

The third group of priests went out of the Beautiful Gate, the eastern gate, down to Motzah valley, and cut willow branches 25-30 feet in length. They also traveled back up to the temple in a procession lined with singing people. Each of the pilgrims had a “lulav” consisting of myrtle, willow, and palm branch, and an Etrog (citron fruit). They would wave their lulavs and sing the same Psalms as the first group. The priests would stand in procession 30 feet apart, take one step, wave the willow, then take another step. The wave of the willows created a wind which represents the Spirit of Yahweh (Ruach ha’Kodesh). They did this all the way up to the temple.

As the two groups converged on the temple, another priest stood on the southeast corner of the temple wall and played the flute calling them into the temple. Since the flute was the pierced instrument, he was called the pierced one.” (Moed Ministries)

Isn’t this incredible?!

Yeshua is the Living Water. The pierced one summoning both the Holy Spirit, and the living water “sent out” from the pool of Siloam to the temple (Moed Ministries)!

The shofar was blown three times while the priests walked around the altar pouring the water and wine on the altar.

When Yeshua died on the tree/cross, that tree/cross was the altar, and like the water and wine, His blood and water that poured out!! This is incredible!


Many have asked what does the name “Emmanuel” mean?
It means “ YHVH (God) is with us.”

John 1:14 (CJB)
14 The Word became a human being and lived with us,
and we saw his Sh’khinah,
the Sh’khinah of the Father’s only Son,
full of grace and truth.

Matthew 1:23 (CJB)
23 “The virgin will conceive and bear a son,
and they will call him ‘Immanu El.”[a]

Now we can understand that He (God) would dwell with us in the Tabernacle of Messiah’s Body.

Yeshua was born during the Feast of Tabernacles, hence the word “Tabernacle.”

Let’s first delve into some additional insight:

Yochanan the Immerser (John the Baptist) was born during Passover (Feast of Pesach), six months before Yeshua was born. Yochanan was born first to tell them the “Light of the World” was coming.

Luke 1:17 (CJB)
17 He will go out ahead of ADONAI in the spirit and power of Eliyahu to turn the hearts of fathers to their children[a] and the disobedient to the wisdom of the righteous, to make ready for ADONAI a people prepared.”

Matthew 17:10-13 (CJB)
10 The talmidim asked him, “Then why do the Torah-teachers say that Eliyahu must come first?” 11 He answered, “On the one hand, Eliyahu is coming and will restore all things; 12 on the other hand, I tell you that Eliyahu has come already, and people did not recognize him but did whatever they pleased to him. In the same way, the Son of Man too is about to suffer at their hands.” 13 Then the talmidim understood that he was talking to them about Yochanan the Immerser.

The Messiah was born six months after Yochanan, and He was born on Feast of Tabernacles, which places his conception during Chanukah—Festival of Lights–The Light of the World! This is brilliant!! Hidden in plain sight!!

John 1:4-9 (CJB)
4 In him was life,
and the life was the light of mankind.
5 The light shines in the darkness,
and the darkness has not suppressed it.
6 There was a man sent from God whose name was Yochanan. 7 He came to be a testimony, to bear witness concerning the light; so that through him, everyone might put his trust in God and be faithful to him. 8 He himself was not that light; no, he came to bear witness concerning the light.
9 This was the true light,
which gives light to everyone entering the world.

Now if you reread that verse, we see plainly that “Light” was written (7) times. Looking back in the beginning of this blog– Feast of Tabernacles, we are reminded that (7) represents “Completeness in HIM.” Are you seeing any connections yet?

It’s so amazing what YHVH has set before us in the Word, and how many of us have missed this because we have blindly accepted “Doctrines of Man,” ignoring or not knowing HIS Appointed times? I am sure He desires and longs for us to “Tabernacle” with Him.

Many say Yeshua (Jesus) was born on December 25th. Biblically, that is incorrect, as the winters are too harsh for travel. The travelers would have to travel very far, and certainly, the shepherds would not have their sheep and lambs far up in the hills in December!! And from the verses presented, we must stay in HIS Word; seek HIS Way (not ours).

Proverbs 14:12 (CJB)
12 There can be a way which seems right to a person,
but at its end are the ways of death.

The truth shall set us free!

John 8:32 (CJB)
32 you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

Lastly, the census was taken during the Feast of Tabernacles because that was during God’s appointed time for the pilgrimages to be made when everyone gathered. Now, one can begin to understand why there wasn’t any room at the Inn. Joseph (Yosef), Miriam (Mary) and Yeshua stayed in a SUKKAH, not a stable, for the light and glory entered the world WHO would then tabernacle with us (John 1:14)!!

May your Sukkot be blessed!

Shamira the Shepherdess (P. Miller)

Chanukah – Day 8 Blessing

Posted by on Dec 19, 2017 in All Posts, Hanukkah | 0 comments

Eighth Candle: “The night is far spent, the day is at hand. Therefore let us cast off the works of darkness, and let us put on the armor of light” (Romans 13:12). “For you/we, brethren, are not in darkness, so that this Day should overtake you/us as a thief.  You/we are all sons of light and sons of the day. We are not of the night, nor of darkness” (1 Thessalonians 5:4-5). “O house of Jacob, come and let us walk In the light of YHVH” (Isaiah 2:5). “For Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path”(Psalm 119:105). “Arise, shine; for your/our light has come! And the glory of YHVH is risen upon you/us” (Isaiah 60:1).




To read all the blessings go to CHANUKAH BLESSINGS

Chanukah – Day 7 Blessing

Posted by on Dec 18, 2017 in All Posts, Hanukkah | 0 comments


Seventh Candle: “Then Yeshua said to them, “A little while longer the light is with you. Walk while you have the light, lest darkness overtake you; he who walks in darkness does not know where he is going. While you have the light, believe in the light, that you may become sons of light” (John 12:35-36).


To read all the blessings go to CHANUKAH BLESSINGS

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